It's a [ profile] sigrundora celebration!

Jul. 28th, 2011 06:34 pm
hildigunnur: (xover - frakked up)
[personal profile] hildigunnur
Let's hope LJ stays up while I compose one birthday post.

Some years ago (the exact number will not be disclosed here), a certain roomie of mine was born. An event we clearly need to celebrate with the sequel to last year's birthday fic.

Title: Chad Michael Murray And The Hopeless Search For The Bromance
Fandom: RPS rots your brain yo!
Rating: Tastes a lot like crack.
Pairing: Chris and Steve totally get their mack on.
Sponsored by: Suntory who makes carbonated alcoholic tea which tastes rather nice.
Ingredients: Take one CMM, his want for bromance and mix with a good amount of craziness.
Approved by: my "Jewish Lesbian wife" whom I left in Japan.

Somewhere in Los Angeles, somewhere in the Hollywood Hills or was it Brentwood, there's a man. A very sad and desperate man. In front of him, there's a stack of manuscripts. Now, there are thousands upon thousands of lost souls in the city of angels who would love to be in his position. To have stacks of manuscripts sent to them for their consideration. But those droves of people unfortunately don't have Chad Michael Murray's star power. They haven't got their mack on with Lindsey Lohan and Hilary Duff or had a long run with a TV series on The CW. Now, that doesn't make Chad an A-lister but recognizable enough to be considered for made-for-TV movies and cheap horror flicks.

But doing those hasn't given Chad what he most desires. He watches countless movies and tv shows and they all seem filled with bros being super close and awesome. How come he's never had this? Why did he always have more chemistry with the girls on the TV shows he was in?

He's stopped being able to watch Supernatural – it's bad enough having to watch Jared and Jensen making googly eyes at each other in real life. Watching the latest X-Men movie made him burst into tears and he had to go on a bender when he heard of the real-life bromance between two of the movie's stars.

Chad looks bleakly at the stack and ponders how he can change his fortune. How can he get from being a hunk in a torn wife-beater, running from a knife-wielding horror monster to being a TV cop with an unnaturally close relationship with their partner? He seriously believes that there has to be a secret club for those who get the HoYay. Jared, Jensen, Misha and Mike all deny this but then again they probably aren’t the right people to ask. Not being on a buddy cop shows and all that though the homoerotic subtext on their shows isn't all that subtextual most of the time. Before he stopped watching Supernatural, Chad wasn't sure what he shipped the most; Sam/Dean, Dean/Castiel or simply the three of them together. Except his one true ship was actually Bobby/Crowley. After some bromance action, Chad wants to be on a show with Mark Sheppard. Everything he touches, turn to awesome with a golden cherry on the top.

Another thing that Chad laments, is that he's officially too old to star in a show about teenager except being someone's skeezy uncle who has no qualms of supplying youngster with wine coolers. Because all the teenage shows are full of gay love – kissing and all. Well, maybe that's going too far for Chad but he would do that much rather than another boring Lifetime movie where he plays the love interest to some girl triumphs over some incredible hardship like having a dyslexic cat or something.

He needs counsel, so much is true. And beer and pie.

Those things can be found at the Padalecki-Ackles household so Chad takes his Escape to said household and find the usual crowd there. Well, ever since that celebratory party after the Tinhat awards last year, the usual crowd had swollen. For instance, there always seemed to be ice skaters around. There was a period where a very tall (though not Jared-esque) skater with a fake tan the color of an slightly aged orange, hung around the fridge a lot, bemoaning the lack of protein drinks. Jensen said he was pretty sure the fellow couldn't find his way home.

There are no ice skaters hanging around at the moment but the living room is absolutely brimming with people. A lot of the usual suspects, Chris and Steve actually making out in the corner like they are fourteen, but also a host of people Chad hasn't been before.

"Chad, what bring you here?" Jared springs to his feet and hugs his friend. "We've been worried about you. You haven't been here to steal our beers for a while now. "

"Yeah, but I'm here now." Chad knows he sounds pretty forlorn.

"Seriously, man. What's up?" Jensen appears at Jared's side.

"Guys, how do you do it? Get all those bromance plots?" Chad knows he reeks of desperation, like he's been rolling around in it, similar to how Harley likes to roll around in road kill.

"Natural chemistry, man." Jared shrugs. "But maybe the others might have some answers."

"Yeah, totally," Jensen says and turns around to face his guests. "Chad here has a problem. He's desperate for some on-screen bromance. Any advice, guys?"

"Talk about your bi-sexual side in interviews," Tom Hardy yells from the porch door where he's smoking cigars with Danneel.

"Actually sleep with another actor," is Michael Fassbender's advice.

"Just be adorable with your co-star in interviews," Jesse Eisenberg suggests.

"Ehm, if I may…" someone says in a hoarse voice, someone sitting next to Misha. A tall woman stands up.

"Hey, Chad, this is my good friend, Dot-Marie," Misha says and hugs her immediately.

"So, young man, have you tried writing something yourself? A buddy cop show you'd want to star in? That's what the young-uns are doing today. They are selling scripts left and right while starring on TV shows so if you find idle time, start typing away."

A couple of hours later, Chad looks at the fruits of the labor on his laptop screen.

A pilot for "The Awesomest Buddy Cop Show Ever – Eat Your Heart Out, Hawaii Five-O"


Detective Awesome (needs another name) sits at his desk with way too much paper work and a cup of Starbucks coffee. Enter Captain Bossman (yes, needs another name) with a good-looking stranger (is Matt Bomer available?)


Detective Awesome, meet Detective Hot (That would be an awesome name yo), your new partner.

To be continued (next year)…
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