[livejournal.com profile] sigrundora's Mega (belated) Birthday Post Part 2: Electric Boog

Aug. 1st, 2010 01:02 am
hildigunnur: (xover - frakked up)
[personal profile] hildigunnur
Title: How Chad Michael Murray Learned All About The Tinhat Awards
Fandom: Mostly CWRPS with a hint of ice and Adam Lambert, shaken and not stirred.
Rating: C for crack and Ooh la la for what Stéphane Lambiel is hoping for.
Who is hooking up with whom? J2 + M2 4EVA. Also look out for mentions of strange wildlife like the cute and cuddly zebraswan, the elusive swangoose and the most intriguing zebraswangoose. Also a slight Kradam and a Pinto bean or two. And more for those who choose to see it that way.
Dude, what the hell? Chad Michael Murray has much left to learn. That's all I'm saying.
Production notes: This brilliant masterpiece was a bit longer in production than first anticipated. The creator is just a total slore. This incredibly moving tale of personal growth and camaraderie is dedicated to one [livejournal.com profile] sigrundora. Yep, now you have a written prove of how incredibly insane your roommate is.

Chad Michael Murray loved to drop in on his mate, Jared Padalecki. Mostly because his refrigerator was always well stocked with beer and the leftovers of delicious pie that Mrs. Ackles sent her son and son-in-law. Chad tried to be careful when he dropped in, though, as there were things he didn't want to witness ever again. He even took care to ring the doorbell and wait all proper-like to be let in.

He was slightly surprised when Michael Rosenbaum opened the door and greeted him, though he wasn't surprised to see Misha Collins there as well. Mike and Misha went together like broccoli and bacon. They invited him in and he followed them to the living room.

"We are here dogsitting," said Mike and pointed to Sadie and Harley when Chad asked him what they were doing there.

"Where are the men of the house and why did they leave you two chuckleheads to dogsit?"

Misha looked at Mike with a 'should we tell him?' look, like Chad wouldn't be able to handle knowing the whereabouts of Jared and Jensen.

"They are at the Tinhat Awards," Mike said, like everyone should know what those were.

"The what now?"

"The Tinhat Awards. Never heard of them? Be glad." Misha said and scratched his nose.

"No, seriously? What are those and how come I haven't heard of them?"

"'Cause you've never had an epic bromance with a co-star or even a proper rivalry with another guy – I think those count now," Mike said, the tone of his voice ever so slightly weary.

"I've never had a what?"

"You see, people have never believed you were screwing your male co-star. I think, by two-timing your lady friends with other ladies, you may have revoked any chance you ever had to be a part of a cutesy portmanteau or having legions of fans claiming that your PR people are evil homophobes."

"OK, I don't know what the two of you have been smoking but please share." Chad looked intently at Misha and Mike.

"Chad, you must have heard about the fangirls who believe that Jared and Jensen are together and …" Mike said, the exasperation obvious in his voice.

"But they are together… I don't understand."

"They don't know that. They are supposed to legitimately think that they are married to Danneel and Genevieve." Misha leaned back in the chair.

"So what the hell does that have to do with some stupid awards show?"

"Everything. You see, every year they pick the best… I think the fans call it real people slash… couple and give them award. This is all very hush-hush and stuff. No paparazzi but apparently the best parties on the planet." Mike looked almost wistful.

"So, how come you two aren't there?"

"'Cause no one even knows we've met. Documented meeting in real life is necessary." Misha shook his head, looking sad.

"Oh. Have Jared and Jensen ever won these awards?"

"Never, even though everyone said that last year should have been their year, what with the joint mortgage and all, but then in swept Adam Lambert and Kris Allen and then Chris Pine and Zachary Quinto to win a joint award. Can't see why they couldn't have split it in three?"

"But how about now? Do they stand a chance?"

"It's doubtful. What with the committed bearding and then the freaking Winter Olympics and the World Cup and Adam Lambert having chemistry with every living thing…"

"Wait, what have the Winter Olympics and the World Cup got to do with it?"

"Go and ask the soccer players and the figure skaters. Apparently they either feel up each other all the time or have epic rivalries that undoubtedly end them in bed together."

This was all becoming a little too much for Chad. He kind of needed to get to the next bar and get very intimately acquainted with a bottle of tequila. Mike and Misha watched him as he got up and he could just detect their smirks.

Now they congratulate themselves on having broken my brain. Those fuckers.

There was enormous ruckus at the front door and Harley and Sadie jumped up from where they had been lying on the floor, barking loudly.

"Hey, Misha! Mike! We won!" someone was shouting from the front door.

"Yeah, it's awesome!" someone else shouted. "Harley, get off him. Bad dog, Harley."

Chad stood rooted to the living room floor as Jared and Jensen stumbled in with a whole host of people.

"Hope you don't mind us bringing the party here," Jensen said, unloading a tin-foil covered top hat on the coffee table.

"Yeah, since you two were bitching about not being invited … oh, hey Chad." Jared waved to Chad as he put down an identical hat next to Jensen's on the coffee table.

"Hey, Chad." Chris and Steve walked past him and Chris slapped him on the back. They had a floppy-haired guy with them Chad had never seen before.

"Oh yeah, Chad. You need to meet our new friend here. Chad, this is Stéphane. Stéphane, this is Chad." Steve pushed the floppy-hair guy towards Chad.

Chad was going to shake the guy's hand but Stéphane jumped him and pulled him into a tight hug instead.

"Oh, enchanté! I love meeting new friends," the guy said with an accent that could have been French.

"Yeah, his date to the awards abandoned him or something."

"Oh, not really. He just had some unfinished business with Evan. If I leave them be for long enough, I'm expecting a ménage a trois when I get back to them."

"OK," Chad inched away while Stéphane had apparently found someone else to cuddle. He was now draped all over both Danneel and Genevieve who had just arrived to the party.

"Hey, Chad. You aren't leaving, are you?" Jared's booming voice stopped Chad in his tracks.

"I just… not my scene I think."

"Hehe, probably not. But it was awesome. We thought we wouldn't stand a chance but they decided to add categories this year. Apparently Adam Lambert got his own category since he manages to have chemistry with everything, even plants. And they gave the athletes actual medals and stuff. I don't even know. But it's awesome. You should totally get with the program and find yourself a good bromance. I once thought we could… but you were too busy chasing skirts. Seriously, find yourself a buddy cop show to star in, instead of making Lifetime movies, Chad. 'Cause this is awesome." Jared flung his overgrown arm over Chad's shoulders.

And maybe it was the tequila Chad finally got (at the party and not at a bar) or maybe it was the ambiance of the evening but Chad found himself calling his agent the next morning and asking:

"Do any of the scripts I've been sent lately, have any, you know, HoYay?"

-The End (finally)

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